Review: Dark Elf To Isekai Chito Seikatsu

Product: Dark Elf To Isekai Chito Seikatsu (ダークエルフと異世界チート性活)
Manufacturer: Tamatoys
Measurements: length – 16.5cm, weight – 370g
Retailers: Kanojo Toys* / J-List*

– Retailers marked with * are affiliate links

Shit, I broke my own drunk horny rule when it comes to buying onaholes in that I bought an onahole… while drunk and horny. It was by Tamatoys too, which is the riskiest of risks. Perfect. Oh well, the box art was hot and the price was pretty decent-ish.

But see that’s exactly where they get ya.

With ya dick.

Anyway whatever, the box is hot and I’d be fully prepared to fuck it into a sloppy cardboard mush if the onahole doesn’t work out. This is Dark Elf To Isekai Chito Seikatsu, otherwise known as an arseload of other names because every retailer is calling it something different.

Roughly it’s meant to parody the ‘isekai’ genre of anime – stuff like Re: Zero, The Rising of the Shield Hero and Captain N: The Game Master – where some dickhead gets sucked into a fantasy world and has a big teen angst bruh moment over stupid shit instead of just having fun.

This onahole revolves around going to another world to cheat with a dark elf, I guess? Who just so happens to look like an onahole? Made by Tamatoys? When worlds collide, am I right.

– Unboxing / Presentation –

Well for starters (aside from the bits of powder all over it when you first take it outta the box), Dark Elf To Isekai Chito Seikatsu looks pretty great. The material is a much nicer shade of brown than the promo pics lead me to believe. The entrance is detailed enough and it’s a pretty lengthy thing all up. Super basic but effective.

Still feels a tad mushy in that sub-$20 Tamatoys kinda way, but that’s totally expected.

Here’s one of the official product shots by the way, more of a light tan than anything:

Then I was quick to remember the internal design of Dark Elf To Isekai Chito Seikatsu also really got me going in my drunken-yet-still-able-to-remember-online-payment-details-whilst-hovering-over-the-purchase-button state.

It looks like a huge jumbled mess of different textures going on, which again is pretty unusual for a budget Tamatoys hole. Typically you get half a nub if that. Exciting stuff!

And sure enough, awkwardly stretching open the real thing to try and get a photo inside looks promising. Whoooole heap of fuckin’ bumps right there.

– Feeling –

Straight up, Dark Elf To Isekai Chito Seikatsu is just plain fun to initially pop into. The protruding labia FLAPS™ playfully tease your head as you slide through, plus as they get slicked up more with lube and pre-cum over time it’s heaps fun to fully slide back out and in again. Sometimes they’ll even get stuck over the hole slightly which offers a feeble roadblock to smash through.

During extended sessions I often found myself leaving the entrance looking like a big frothy wreck of fluids. Pretty hot, just… be careful putting it back down on the desk or something afterwards.

From there the tunnel simply goes on a full assault, laced with little nubs and a two ribbed sections which spiral down into the inner depths. Probably just like fucking Mr. DNA from Jurassic Park I reckon. It’s good. Like… surprisingly good. The stimulation isn’t anything over-the-top, but there’s certainly enough going on to keep your shaft guessing with each thrust.

The ribbed pasta-ass noodle lookin’ bits really made me tense up in pleasure around the mid-section, as they’d grind and lock across my head catching all the right pleasure points. Often I’d just focus on jerking this part of the onahole alone before slamming it down hard upon orgasm.

Sure feels weird writing ‘orgasm’ in a review after just saying cum over and over. I dunno, like I should be wearing a top hat or something hey. Fancy.

But yes, Dark Elf To Isekai Chito Seikatsu is immensely satisfying. The tunnel builds up a bit of pressure after a while, but nothing too crazy – just enough to ensure the walls keep hugging.

I did find that ramming all the way to the end would sometimes deliver a tiny, like… pinch? Right on the tip. As if there was a tiny little grandma inside who isn’t wearing her glasses and goes for the cock instead of the cheek. Didn’t happen often, but boy was it always a shock.

My only real problem here is the walls are on the thinner side of things, so it’s quite easy to feel yourself bulging out the side on occasion. But again, it’s a budget hole.

Oh yeah, maybe it was just a strange tail-end of Australian winter thing, but the tunnel was fuckin’ ICE COLD at times. I’ve never had that with an onahole before. I mean it quickly warms up after a few thrusts – exactly like starting a car with your penis – but wow. ICE. COLD.

– Cleaning – 

Easy as shit to clean, the material is flexible enough to stretch out under running water. You shouldn’t have any major issues here. It will begin to feel sticky to the touch after a few washes though, so you might want to rub it down with some cornflour (cornstarch if you’re in the US) or talcum powder to retain its original texture.

Cornflour/starch is heaps cheaper though, and probably won’t give you eight types of cancer like talc.

– Summary –

Maybe I’m a cunt for expecting every budget Tamatoys onahole to feel like garbage, but that way it’s always extra nice when one really delivers!

Dark Elf To Isekai Chito Seikatsu is a great option if you’re looking for something with variety and a good mid-level range of stimulation and don’t want to spend a stupid amount of money. It’s not doing anything amazing, but that’s your job anyway.

SUPER QUICK CUM VID BELOW. A rare moment when I had the apartment to myself so I could make grunty caveman cum noises.

Dark Elf To Isekai Chito Seikatsu

+ Good mid-level of stimulation, always something in there to keep you busy
+ The entrance itself is fun to mess around with
+ Good value for your money

– Walls are a little thin
– The material will get sticky pretty quick

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