Review: Bread de Ecstasy – Croissant

Product: Bread de Ecstasy – Croissant
Manufacturer: Seiraku Toys
Measurements: length – 22cm, weight – 935g
Retailers: MotsuToys* (EU) / Onahole.com* (US)

– This product was provided by MotsuToys and Onahole.com for masturbation review purposes
– Retailers marked with * are affiliate links

There’s nothing quite like the smell of freshly baked goods, but have you ever wondered what it’d be like to drop your pants in the middle of a bakery and just start fucking the absolute shit out of the warm, fluffy depths of a croissant as several people scream and hit you with indestructible day-old breadsticks?

Have you?!

Seiraku Toys clearly have, and the world is now a butter better place for it with the introduction of Bread de Ecstasy – Croissant. 

Perhaps unsurprisingly, this is the first onahole designed like a croissant of all things.

I was gonna say the first ever bread-related thing, but I’m pretty sure there was a disposable onahole years ago that was meant to look like a can of bread? Perhaps it really was just a can of bread and too many drinks were had that night…

But haha anyway, it’s been a while since we’ve had a really weird ‘why’ concept hit the market like this, and I’m all for it.

– Unboxing / Presentation –

I feel like there was a huge missed opportunity not including some novelty butter or jam themed lube with this. But before we really dive in, MAN this box art is good.

Hell, the whole box itself is just top quality stuff. Really sturdy cardboard and there’s even full artwork printed inside.

Like you can even see the other side of the bakery with its front door and everything. Secrets revealed. Ridiculously unnecessary attention to detail, 10/10 – would peek inside again.

It’s lookin’ a bit sickly shade of yellow here, but it’s not quite this neon unless your overhead lighting and mobile phone camera are also total dogshit. It is a very niche club and everyone is welcome to join.

Honestly wasn’t expecting Bread de Ecstasy to be this big, but sure – it does sorta look like a croissant of the slug monster variety.

There’s some massive heft to it as well, weighing in at nearly a kilo (935g / 2.1 lbs), yet it manages to strike a balance between feeling super soft while maintaining its uh, shape. You can really squish your fingers right in, but the onahole never flops around or droops like an undercooked blob of dough.

Seems like Seiraku Toys simply wanted to flex the full range of what their onahole material is capable of, so props to ’em.

“Sir, we could just make a soft vagina onah-”
“No. Big croissant”

I will say though, there’s a bit of a weird damp smell to it right out of the box which hasn’t gone away yet. Even after…

– The great Vegemite French offense of 2025 –

As soon as the wonderful team at MotsuToys sent me this about two weeks ago, my first thought was to pop on down to a local bakery and compare this thing (visually at least) with a proper, fresh croissant.

The plan (?) was to whack it down on the same tray, take a few pics, have a stupid laugh and consume at least one of them. And I was actually really looking forward to this too, because I’d only been there once before to buy a pie and it was good as hell.

BUT NO. TURNS OUT THE BAKERY CLOSED MONTHS AGO. The only thing left is a bloody Breadtop.

I dunno how widespread Breadtop actually is around the world, but their idea of anything is shrink-wrapped blocks of sweaty sugar grease that were cryogenically frozen years ago.

They’d sold out of their croissants by the time I got there anyway, so hey.

Whatever, I’ll pick one up from the supermarket instead. Might as well do the rest of my weekly shop while I’m there lugging around a fuckable pastry in my backpack I suppose.

But also… cheesy Vegemite scrolls.

When am I ever going to have another opportunity to introduce my delightful non-Aussie readers (YOU, MOST LIKELY) to this unique abomination in a vague connection to an onahole?

I love these things man, but this is probably the most offensive image I’ve ever uploaded on here.

Whatever, croissants hey.

As I sat in this empty park at a table covered in mystery fluid and bird shirt, it rapidly dawned upon me that perhaps this entire gimmick should have just stayed in my head rather than manifesting into the real world.

But sure, yeah! Bread de Ecstasy – Croissant does actually resemble… two really dry croissants fused together? Who knew?

You know what’s missing though, yeah? That’s right. A bit of fuckin’ aaaahh Vegemite.

There we go. THAT’S THE STUFF.

Really gotta GET IT IN THERE. (I will not be trying this as lube, don’t worry).

This is the kind of avatar you’d see dudes on Twitter replying to OnlyFans bots with “luv 2 eat u out just like dis baby”.

– Feeling –

Despite its clumsy-looking design where the entrance barely even seems like it’s there, getting inside Bread de Ecstasy – Croissant is a breeze. The hole easily stretches over your head without any fuss and immediately locks you into place.

I was genuinely expecting the opening point to kinda awkwardly flop around or crumple (crumble?), so that was a nice surprise.

Love how Seiraku Toys have started naming all the different tunnel checkpoints. ‘Croissant Climax Cove’ 😭

Once you’re in, the walls will softly keep pulling you further in with a series of thick nubs that latch onto your shaft. They’re so densely packed that it feels more like a ribbed texture swirling down the entire length more than anything.

This makes it very easy to bottom this tunnel out right away and stay there; especially with the onahole’s overall weight pressing down on your crotch.

Scientifically, this is probably what it’s like to be an unsliced hot dog bun when someone is violently fingering all its guts out to ram a hot dog in there.

As far as the stimulation goes, this is a pretty light and fluffy the whole way through. Pretty much exactly what I’d expect from a croissant onahole, I suppose? Taking one-handed notes mid-wank while having an existential crisis about why I need to ponder what it’d be like compared to a croissant’s actual vagina.

But yeah, it’s very easy-going. Soft and squishy, especially up towards the end zone which is surrounded by a pretty huge amount of doughy padding.

I love that you can get really rough when you’re on the verge of cumming too. Yank it down with both hands and just absolutely crush the entire blob on your cock when giving it a cream filling (sorry).

Extremely satisfying stuff.

I do sorta wish the tunnel had a little bit more punch to it though, especially towards the end. When you’ve really settled into a good rhythm and gotten past the fact that you’re fucking one of the least appealing looking onaholes ever, it’s very easy to… simply keep going.

Every time I’ve used this has been a really lengthy session – which isn’t exactly bad or anything, but there’s been a few times where I’ve just been craving some added stimulation to push me over the edge.

This may be entirely down to wanking into onaholes for over a decade though, who knows. You’ll probably be fine if you go in expecting a comfy, squishy tunnel without any surprises.

– Cleaning –

Do you know the only bad thing about slathering Vegemite all over your Bread de Ecstasy – Croissant in the middle of a park? You need to find somewhere to wash it.

Luckily Bread de Ecstasy – Croissant is like, really fucking easy to clean. The entrance can be stretched pretty bloody wide when flushing it out under running water and the soft materiel dries out easily enough on the outside.

Just make sure to thoroughly dry the tunnel with a microfibre cloth or whatever, as it can trap a bit of moisture if you’re not careful. Surprisingly this hasn’t gotten sticky or weird feeling despite everything I’ve put it through so far. Durability seems perfectly fine.

Eventually someone else walked in to piss in the only urinal right next to this sink and I had to act like it was perfectly normal to be standing there, washing a rubber croissant. Because it is.

Oh no. I didn’t bring anything to dry this with either. (Also someone wrote ‘Indian bog suck’ on the toilet paper dispenser? BOG suck?!)

We’re gonna be here a while…

My only complaint here – as mentioned somewhere earlier – is the fairly heavy oily, wet smell it has going on ever since unboxing. Two weeks later and it hasn’t gone away at all.

Bit unusual for a Seiraku Toys product, but I have to assume it’s because they’ve made this material so soft or something.

– Summary –

Bread de Ecstasy – Croissant has everything you’d want in a softer, comfortable onahole with a stable level of mild stimulation all wrapped up in a baffling visual concept which makes it look like you’re slamming a huge lump of slug creature croissant beehive shit on your cock.

If you can get past that, it feels nice and heavy with an especially fantastic end zone.

Hell, the design might even work if you’re after something you can easily hide in plain sight! Surely nobody would ask why you’ve got a croissant dripping with a mysteriously milky white liquid on your desk as you’re furiously shuffling towards the door with your pants around your ankles screaming “GEEEEET OUTTA HERE”.

– Bread de Ecstasy – Croissant –

+ A very safe level of mild stimulation that’ll keep pulling you in further. Great for long, lazy wanks
+ Excellent weight to it
+ The fact that it doesn’t exactly look like an onahole may make it easier to hide if your parents, flatmates or local Santa’s have a bad habit of going through your stuff
+ You can SEE the WHOLE BAKERY artwork if you look inside the box

– A big croissant that you can’t even eat bouncing on your dick is a cruel tease
– The material has a long-lasting oily, wet smell to it
– Lacks that extra punch needed to push you over the edge sometimes; the sensation can get pretty repetitive

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This review product was provided by MotsuToys and Onahole.com. Thanks again!