La Bocca Della Verita – This is a true story

mouthoftruth_header

Product: La Bocca Della Verità (The Mouth of Truth)
Manufacturer: Magic Eyes
Retailers: NLS / Kanojo Toys* / CoolMST* / Toy Demon* / otonaJP / Motsu Toys / Otona-Sekai / Love Merci
Artwork: いろどり

Retailers marked with * are affiliate links

Waaaait, wait wait wait, hold up. What’s all this then? A sex toy parody of La Bocca della Verità (the ‘Mouth of Truth’)? That’s like, an actual marble face carving.

Situated in Rome, Italy – dating back two bazillion years – it was supposedly believed that putting your left hand in its mouth and telling a lie would result in it getting chomped off. Nowadays tourists test this out for a photo op by chanting the magical words: “I will not ruin my holiday shots with an Instagram filter”. Oh man, of all the things to turn into an onahole!

Then again, there are plenty of toys out there based on real-life porn stars. I guess that’s pretty much the same concept of drawing inspiration from an ancient, crumbling relic.

mouthoftruthirlyoPhwoar. Magic Eyes’ La Bocca della Verità (I’ll just refer to it as The Mouth of Truth from here on out) is a blowjob style onahole, which makes sense. I mean, who wouldn’t want to pretend they’re face-fucking that stone cold sexy beast?

This one promises a more realistic feeling compared to other toys like it (which you’ll soon see why). Aaaannd having pretty much become an instant fan of Magic Eyes after I replaced traditional pants-related clothing with Sujiman Kupa Rinka last month, I was keen to check this one out.

Because masturbation, you know?

mouthoftruth01‘Mouth Figvure’ huh. Yeah, I think I like their rendition of the carving better. Shame it’s such a big box, yet there’s still just one tiny packet of lube included.

mouthoftruth07Not that you’d ever be holding it like this to use – and I wouldn’t suggest trying to push Rei Ayanami up your urethra – but The Mouth of Truth feels great in your hand. Magic Eyes’ own take on soft-skin material continues to impress. It’ll retain its texture after being washed, and dries off pretty quick (especially compared to the interior, yikes).

Plus it’s loaded with the silver ion Ag+, which is supposed to help kill any potential bacteria. Maybe with enough thrusting force, you too could absorb this magical super power. Then Stan Lee would have to make his required cameo and you could call the police.

But let’s hurry up and take a peek insiiiii-I HOPE YOU LIKE TEETH.

mouthoftruth04Yup, The Mouth of Truth features a set of plastic front teeth jammed in there real good. A lot of oral toys out there just have teeth for decoration as an extension of the soft rubber molding, so this is pretty interesting!

We might need some more promo shots first. Especially when there’s another Mega Drive background involved.

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mouthoftruthpromo2Alright, time to do some Blast Processing in there. Unlike say, Goku Fella 4 (the only real comparison I can make at this point in my sex toy blogging life), The Mouth of Truth is a rather tight hole from beginning to end. I’m just gonna say, straight up, my penis thinks this onahole is incredible. But! BUT! Its entry point alone makes this a bit difficult to ‘review’, because those teeth really aren’t going to be for everyone. Especially if you have a sensitive head.

The toy has a thick tongue that doesn’t give much leeway, so your dick’s immediately pushed up to rub against the top row of teeth, followed by super thick ridges on the roof of the mouth. Meanwhile the tongue’s texture – caught somewhere between smooth and chunky peanut butter – joins forces with the bottom row of teeth sliding against the underside. Fuck. Me. Heavenly.

Once you hit the uvula (that dangly punching bag thing in the back of your mouth) and start pushing forward, The Mouth of Truth will push right back. The throat is insanely narrow and littered with notches over raised, spongy lumps.

whoppertimeEven onahole characters are aware of the universal gesture for “I want a Whopper”.

Actually, that image was originally Magic Eyes stating you can apply lipstick to it and create pseudo kiss marks. Really. Wait, what was I up to? Oh right, the back of its throat. Um. *゚ー゚ Overall there’s a lot going on The Mouth of Truth – never a dull moment. There’s been a few times where I just focused this thing entirely on my glans, and it’s fucking radical to the max.

Attempting to turn it around mid-masturbation is a tad risky though. It’s been very much designed to work one way – holding it sideways was totally unpleasant as the teeth really scrape into your shaft. Upside down’s okay though. Walks on the beach, too. Wanna go see a movie later?

It’s a very different fake blowjob to that of the Goku Fella 4, which is much sloppier and looser with authentic noises to match. The Mouth of Truth is surprisingly quiet by comparison, but offers so many different stimulating options at once. Magic Eyes just get it when it comes to crafting the inner design of an onahole; their attention to detail is stupid good. And it’s cheaper than A-One’s Goku Fella.

mouthoftruth02Just like the real thing, The Mouth of Truth warns that it may bite off your hand. Well, you can’t really fit a hand in there. Fingers? Can The Mouth of Truth really take off your fingers if you tell a lie? No. That’s dumb. Mystery solved forever.

But that got me thinking about how strong the teeth actually are, and if they’d be able to bite down and break a finger. Cadbury’s Fingers.

Oh. But yeah, those teeth are quality. I thought they’d fall out or something after a while, but so far so good. I’ve been using it for about two weeks now. Not… not non-stop however. I need two hands to type at a decent speed.

The only downer to this onahole is drying off the inside after you’ve washed it. It’s a pain in the arse due to how tight and cluttered everything is. That teeth and tongue tag team does a bang up job at blocking most attempts at patting it down with a cloth, and the back of the throat tends to trap moisture. Eeeeeehhhh. Just have to store it sensibly and let it air dry. For ages.

And while they only throw in enough lube for one go, it’s nice to see Magic Eyes continue the adventures of ‘girl with vibrators in her hair’. This comic is sort of hidden, printed on the side of the cardboard insert within the box. Maybe one day they’ll sneak a comic inside the actual onahole.

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mouthoftruthcomicA classic to rival that of Family Circus and Garfield.

All up, I’m very pleased with The Mouth of Truth. High build quality, fantastic attention to detail, and those teeth reeeeally do it for me. Alternatively you could maybe just buy one of those chattering teeth toys and shove it in a sock filled with pudding.

Final score: Experience the thrill of ejaculating into an ancient, inanimate tourist attraction in the comfort of your own home. Wonderful!

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14 Responses to La Bocca Della Verita – This is a true story

  1. Sorry, but every time I see an oral onahole I immediately think of the Annoying Orange.

    Fuck you, internet.

    Perhaps a crossover product? The Annoying Onahole? It sings out-of-key tunes and looks mockingly at you when you fuck it. Just like real sexy time!

    • Infernal Monkey says:

      Ahaha, I’d be okay with this if it was designed as a cheap disposable! Actually, maybe they could just sell an actual orange.

      I saw some Annoying Orange DVDs in Target the other day and frowned at them as I kept walking. :(

  2. Anonymous says:

    Hum, been looking into this one. I’ve been wanting to try the Super Fella lube with this toy, and been thinking about purchasing both. As a bit of a newbie, would that be wise? Or should I just stick with the lube I already use? (Maria Ozawa’s ‘Love Potion’, they call it. :x )

    • Infernal Monkey says:

      I’ve actually been using this combination lately! The Superb Fella lube works reeaaally well here. Recommended!

  3. Anonymous says:

    Try j-lube, its a powder that you can mix with warm water to make warm lube. the more powder you mix the thicker and slimier it is. A little experimenting and you can get it close to saliva. Plus it cheep, 10 oz for 20 bucks and each oz can make up to gallon depending on your mixture. If you research it, its what vet use on animals but its also the fav lube for people into fisting because of how slick it is. Dont drop any on the floor, you step in it you are going down and not in a good way.

  4. Gouki says:

    I am convinced! Gonna get me one! Funny comic LOL

  5. Anonymous says:

    Can you turn the toy inside out while cleaning it? How would you dry it deep inside any other way?

    • Infernal Monkey says:

      Hmm, it’d be possible, but I really wouldn’t suggest flipping this one inside out! It’d likely end up ripping the plastic teeth out. I use a microfiber cloth to reach the end of it, just wrap it around a finger and jam it in there. The mouth stretches out easy enough to do that.

  6. robokou says:

    LOL! That video gets me every time—no matter how many times I watch it, hahaha.

    Anyway, thanks for the review. This was the confirmation I was looking for before purchasing. (But is there a reason for not using a rating system?)

    But the real reason I’m commenting is to tell you (and hopefully a large number of other onahole users) that a great way for drying onaholes is to use – (wait for it…) – TAMPONS. Get the really thick, absorbent ones that come with a pull-string attached. I’ve used this method for the holes of both the Meiki Extreme Pleasure Hip and the Meiki ZXY. Trust me, it works GREAT. If done right – such as making sure the tampon is pushed down to the very end of the hole – it should work with no problem, leaving your onaholes dry in at least half the normal time.

    In fact, it works so well that I’m surprised that it seems not to be common knowledge among onahole users. It makes me wonder if everyone else knows something that I don’t… (And I’m assuming that everyone knows that covering the “skin” of onaholes in corn starch after a wash is great for maintaining their original condition.)

    • Infernal Monkey says:

      Holy crap, that’s an amazing idea! I seriously would have never even considered tampons, but it makes so much sense!

      I just use microfiber towels for drying which I think (?) is what most people go with. It works, but can damage some of the more fragile onaholes.

      (And thanks! Never been a huge fan of rating systems personally, but it’s something I’ve considered switching to for a while now)

  7. ThatOneChick says:

    Gonna be honest here. Not a dude, found your onahole reviews by ‘accident’ and have been crying in laughter at the entries. There are onahole reviews on Youtube but there’s just something more, I don’t know, honest about this since you’re skipping the bullshit stuff and just going right into whether or not these things are worth the money (and the fuck) all the while poking fun at how silly looking these things are. And as I said, looking through your blog I’ve gotten a whole new, er….PERSPECTIVE (?) on onaholes. I can’t use them obviously but it’s sort of amazing the lengths makers will go to fight for their money by making the most pleasurable toy ever. Reading through some of this stuff, even I was going ‘WHAT A RIP OFF!’ when you mentioned some that just began to shred or fall apart. I always assumed they had some lasting stay to them but I guess I was wrong on that. They want you coming back. (snort)

    And the mouth ones freak me out. Someone is screaming that I should be freaked out by ALL of them but the ones with the mouths….it’s like…those CPR dummies and those things gave me the creeps before but when you cut the face in half and make the mouth super stretchable and fill it with bumps and ridges? (shivers) Though of the ones you’ve reviewed this actually looks the least freaky which I guess is good…until you remember the inspiration for this and the nightmares begin again. (Don’t tell or think of lies when you’re using this, guys.)

    And the video….I will never NOT stop laughing at that. I can only guess the sound you made was a call back to those cigar-smoking big boss types?

    • Infernal Monkey says:

      Wow, thanks so much, ThatOneChick! One of my main goals with the blog was to try and make these reviews entertaining enough for everyone, so this really made my day. <3

      But yeah, the onahole industry is pretty insane. There are so many companies out there desperately releasing any old garbage, it's almost impossible to keep up (euhehue) with it all. And it's normal to be freaked out by the blowjob ones especially! I still question some of them. There's something about trying to make a little rubber mouth that'll probably always seem a bit... off. They get even weirder/funnier in motion.

      (Totally didn't even think of the cigar-smoking big boss angle, but it works!)

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