Competition! Win an onahole starter pack

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Update: This competition has now ended! Congratulations to Carl!

Heeeey, happy new year everyone! Don’t worry, we’re in the futuristic space of 2020 now. It’s all okay – finally where our old busted year-2000 flying cars are piloted by smaller flyer cars. What a time to be alive.

Honestly, 2019 was a bloody horrendous year for me personally and I think that’s pretty well reflected in how little content I was able to squeeze out. But whatever, you know? Gotta stay positive and stuff. I’m sorry if I never got around to answering your emails or comments at certain points. 🙁 I don’t mean to be a cunt on purpose; I’m going to try not being a total recluse going forward.

That said, 2019 was a breakout year for the blog! Overall views were heaps up, and affiliate sales from ToyDemon alone absolutely exploded during the last few months. Oh yeah plus I also made it onto Kinkly’s top 100 sex blogs and 6th place in their reader’s choice awards, that was neat. So thank you all so much for the support!

I bought a six-pack of the cheapest beer possible to celebrate!

(Also I finally saved up enough to cover the potential postage costs for this lot)

– The prize – 

Look real shit, I didn’t really know what to call this comp, but it’s kinda everything you’d need to start off with? I think? Alternatively it’s just a whole bunch of good things for your dick.

Alright! So what we’ve got here consists of:

– A Horny Nurse’s Treatment AIKA onahole by NPG
– A bottle of lube from Magic Eyes
– A ‘quick dry stick’ by G Project to easily dry the insides of your onahole
– A USB-powered hole warmer (please note I opened this just to confirm it really only needs a USB connection to work – it does)
– A storage case for your onahole. Secret: it’s basically a pencil case

Everything is brand new and sealed aside from the USB warmer, which is brand new… but not sealed!

– How to enter –

Super easy stuff again, just leave a comment below! Anything’s good. But please make sure to fill in the email field so I can contact the winner. (Your email won’t show up publicly!)

Entries close by the end of January 10th. Any timezone, whatevs. The winner will be chosen at random and notified by email. This competition is open to everyone worldwide.

Good luck!

218 thoughts on “Competition! Win an onahole starter pack”

  14. Is this an ethical way to start the New Year?

    No? Probably not. Damn the ethics though! One of us will get AIKA! And a USB pussy warmer!! HELL YEAH!!!

    Reply

  15. I’ve been holding out on owning one of these but if youre giving these for free, who am I to question it? New year New dick sensations

    Reply

  47. Happy new year, Thx for all the amazing, weird and funny reviews, please give us more and more, HAHAHAHAHA. also hope to win XD.

    Reply

  61. Happy New Year Infernal Monkey. May you be blessed with a wonderful year ahead and congratulations on the accomplishments. Take care.

    Reply

  83. If I win this, definitely going to gift it to my friend, since he can’t make up his mind which one to choose. Good luck everyone!

    Reply

  86. This would be a good way for me to get into this hole (pun intended) thing , I might save some much needed money this way

    Reply

  94. I Gently but quickly, Sersuckdickalot guided the erect member towards her vaginal lips. She pushed a small part of it inside with her hand, her vagina feeling a little tight. Then, she rocked her hips down and to her surprise, found that his onahole was lubricated enough to accept his organ inside fully.

    Gl to everyone! :3

    Reply

  125. could you send me some fire and/or ashes when I win the prize? I heard Australia is in flames for all the karma they inflicted upon the internet so I want the authentic Aussie shipping experience.

    Reply

  134. reading your articles are my guilty pleasure my guy, keep it up for 2020 and remember to take care of yourself (not just the dick)

    Reply

  140. 2020 will be a nice year since the number itself has 2 holes in it. Gonna be a great year for hip reviews, so get on/in it infernal!

    Reply

  142. My life decisions led me here, what a great life. Also I need some hole to heal the one in my heart after the death of my previous one, not my heart the onahole.

    Reply

  152. I forgot to buy an onahole before coming home from my Japan trip. Guess my luggage was already overweight as it was with all the doujinshi I brought home though. Thanks for the posts infernal!

    Reply

  155. Aw fuck AIKA, you’re my kinda gyaru. But please stop with any more plastic surgery. You’re starting to look very fake, dear.

    Reply

  161. Yo for real that onahole warmer looks good. I might need to buy one of those. Congrats on the 6th place.Maybe this year you’ll get first. Here’s to another great year!

    Reply

  170. I’ve been reading your blog for a while now, you absolutely deserve 1st in the reader’s choice poll as far as I’m concerned. Happy new year’s ya funny motherfucker.

    Reply

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