Review: Goku-Hida Virgin Octopus

Product: Goku-Hida Virgin Octopus (GOKU-HIDA VIRGIN[極ヒダばーじん])
Manufacturer: G Project
Measurements: length – 13cm, weight – 300g
Retailers: Motsu Toys* / otonaJP* / Kanojo Toys*

– Retailers marked with * are affiliate links

“OC… OCTOPUS!” I hear myself scream before even fully waking; my bedsheets soaked in sweat as a dream-fueled-tentacle-adventure erection pierces the feeble constraints of my Fred Flintstone boxer shorts.

Glancing at my phone, it’s been exactly one and a half minutes since I passed out from cumming so hard that all leftover energy got expelled via my urethra. “Octopus…” I mumble, side-eyeing a heavily used rubber tube laying next to me. Pumped to the brim and still warm… I could just… use that as lube for round two, r-right?

Forgive me, I’m going back in.

… Goku-Hida Virgin Octopus is one of the absolute best onaholes I’ve ever used. Holy shit. I actually can’t get enough of this one, it’s almost scary.

This is the thiiiird onahole in G Project’s Goku-Hida series, I believe? Fourth? Something, I dunno. They all share the same type of ‘Grow Up Skin’ material, and in this instance the design itself doesn’t look any different from most of their other releases.

Which is a bit of a shame, since when it comes to the concept of an octopus-themed wank toy, I think of something like this:

This is also why I’ll never get hired by anyone to design anything.

– Unboxing / Presentation – 

Yeah, very simple on the outside. It packs a decent amount of weight for its size and feels pretty rugged. Like, there’s a heap of flexibility to the material, but you can still get a hefty death-grip going just in case a very complex situation arises where you need to seal the onahole completely around your shaft for protection.

Perhaps if you are masturbating near an active volcano or inside a beehive. That would be a less than ideal environment to maintain an erection, but whatever hey.

The big thing here however is Goku-Hida Virgin Octopus’ lack of big… ness? This comes in at just 13cm – just slightly taller than a typical military-issue Waluigi amiibo.

While G Project’s ‘Grow Up Skin’ material is built to accommodate some fairly intense stretching, I think they really would have been better off just making this a tad bigger. Especially given the $30+ price point. Kinda looks like you’re holding something out of a prize machine.

At least it easily fits inside the nice little storage bag G Project include in the box though! They never change the size of this bag, man. Even for onaholes that are clearly six hundred times bigger.

HAVE A LOOK

– Feeling –

So finally getting to how this even remotely has anything to do with an octopus – G Project have lined the walls with some impressively detailed suckers.

These things are thick and bumpy as fuck, and while going with tentacles as the internal texture isn’t anything new (amazingly), I don’t think I’ve ever seen ’em on this level before.

Probably like getting a hand/footjob from Ursula.

Flipping the onahole inside out helps show that one strand in particular is fuckin’ huge, and you can sorta see the little surprise spiral tip you’ll smack into with each thrust.

Once inside, the sensation is immediately grabby. Each strand struggles around your cock, tangling together and mashing into the shaft with a gentle – yet relentless – grind. These walls are always moving along with you in unpredictable ways.

Push in deeper and rougher however, and Goku-Hida Virgin Octopus happily returns the favour by rapidly clamping down tight, forcing these tentacle-textures to crush hard. One layer of suckers is slightly coarser than the rest too, mixing in a harsh little scrape when you least expect it.

Every time my head snagged on something I could feel my arse cheeks clenching further into themselves.

But the beautiful thing is simply working yourself into a casual wank rhythm. Goku-Hida Virgin Octopus’ intensity is entirely up to you – just gotta grip down harder. Maybe go slow a bit and work in a few quick pumps. Repeat until the end of days.

I’ve had sessions last over an hour with this thing, slowly building up orgasms strong enough to leave me feeling like I was either on the verge of a religious experience or a medical emergency.

It’s so fucking good.

I swear it just keeps getting better every time, too. A lot of companies like to bullshit about their onaholes as if the tunnel is magically adapting to your cock over time (and in most cases that just means you’re making it looser), but maybe – just MAYBE – there’s something to G Project’s claim with this ‘Grow Up Skin’.

At this point my head fully anticipates which nub it’ll catch on before even sneaking in.

Perhaps my brain is just broken from too much cum™. It is a mystery.

– Cleaning –

Dead easy. You can flip this bitch inside out to clean with no worries. Takes very little effort to rinse out, and the tunnel is flexible enough that you can whack a microfibre towel down it to dry in no time. And by no time I mean some time. But not much!

 

– Summary –

Personally, Goku-Hida Virgin Octopus might just be my favourite onahole so far. Like, fuckin’ ever. It doesn’t look like much, and the octopus theme could understandably be off-putting for some folk, but this chaotic tunnel works together in such an unbelievably incredible way. The way it constantly twists and tugs onto your shaft; the little spiral stinger at the end which gently mashes into your tip – weeow.

The stimulation is a non-stop massage and it can be as soft or hard as you want it to be. Insanely addictive.

(Oh yeah, big thanks to Dreamr for recommending I check this onahole out a few months back! I probably would have completely skipped over it otherwise).

Goku-Hida Virgin Octopus

+ Insanely unpredictable textures constantly keep things interesting
+ Amazing massaging effect with each stroke
+ Perfect for slow sessions or if you wanna just smash in as hard and fast as possible
+ Simple to clean, high durability

– The onahole is on the smaller side of things. It’s been designed for some pretty wild stretching, but might not fully satisfy those of you with larger cocks
– It’s 4am at the time of writing and I really want some calamari rings

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